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#511270 - 06/17/08 06:54 AM How many gears does a french tank have?
13Hawk Offline
Baby Jay

Registered: 07/08/04
Loc: Topeka
5 - 4 in reverse, and 1 in forward in case they get attacked from behind.


Why do the French call their fighter the "Mirage"?

Because it's never seen in a combat zone.


How do you kill a Frenchman?

Slam the toilet seat down when he's getting a drink.


Why do French naval ships have glass bottoms?

To see all their other ships.


A man askes his companion, "What's the most common French expression"? His friend scratches his head, shrugs his shoulders and replies, "I give up!"


What do you get if you see a Frenchman up to his neck in sand?

More sand.


How do you stop a French tank?

Shoot the guy that's pushing it.


What does "Maginot" mean in German?

Welcome!


Why did the Frenchman sell his water skis?

He couldn't find a lake with a hill in it.


How many Frenchmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It doesn't matter; if you're depending on the French to do the job, it's screwed anyway.


What do you do if a Frenchman throws a hand-grenade at you?

Take the pin out and throw it back.


What do you do if a Frenchman throws a pin at you?

Run like hell - he's still got a hand-grenade between his teeth.


Did you hear about the French helicopter crash?

The pilot got cold, so he turned off the fan.


What's the difference between a dead skunk and a dead Frenchman In the middle of the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.


Did you hear about the French hockey team?

They all drowned in spring training.


Did you hear about the new automatic French parachutes?

They open on impact.


Did you hear about the French submarine with a screen door?

Don't laugh... it keeps the fish out.


How many Frenchman does it take to guard Paris?

Nobody knows, its never been tried.


What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up?

The Army.


What did France used to be called?

Germany, and then we saved them.


Why don't they have fireworks at Euro Disney?

Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender.


Why did the French plant trees along the Champs Elysees?

So the Germans could march in the shade.


What do you call a Frenchman with a sheep under one arm and a goat under the other?

A bisexual.


How do you get a one-armed Frenchman out of a tree?

Wave to him.


Why wasn't Christ born in France?

Because they couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.


The American military wears combat boots. What does the French military wear?

Track shoes.


How do you sink a French battleship?

Put it in water.


What is the most useful thing in the French Army?

A rearview mirror, so they can see the war.


Why don't the French eat M&M candies?

They're too hard to peel.


Seen on back of restroom door:
"Here I sit with my buns a'clenchin, giving birth to another Frenchman. "

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#511271 - 06/17/08 07:07 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: 13Hawk]
Jhwk Offline
Max Falkenstien

Registered: 10/29/07
Loc: Those your real teeth?
problem with Frogs?
_________________________
On Tap: Hefe, Blonde, Smoked Stout, Smoked Mild Age: Mead, Berlinerweiss Ferment: Smoked Hefe

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#511272 - 06/17/08 07:42 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: Jhwk]
jayheel Offline
Under New Management

Registered: 12/29/06
Loc: Spencer Basement
The French lost 1,300,000 in WWI...4,000,000 wounded. 3 out of 5 males 18-35 were either killed or permanently wounded. I wonder why they didn't feel like fighting 20 years later after seeing the Nazis wipe Poland's ass.
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It's shame because hating on the Jayhawks means you hate the United States of America.

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#511273 - 06/17/08 08:34 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: jayheel]
jayhwk01 Offline
Timmy's Nemesis

Registered: 01/22/05
Loc: Mt. Oread's Shadow
Quote:

The French lost 1,300,000 in WWI...4,000,000 wounded. 3 out of 5 males 18-35 were either killed or permanently wounded. I wonder why they didn't feel like fighting 20 years later after seeing the Nazis wipe Poland's ass.




Yes far better to roll over and be slaves or worse than to fight. I think the Brits and and a couple of other European nations lost a few people in the Great War but they somehow mustered up the courage to defend themselves against Hitler's Nazi's.
_________________________
kusports.net Peace Out and Rock Chalk Jayhawk.

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#511274 - 06/17/08 08:34 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: jayheel]
13Hawk Offline
Baby Jay

Registered: 07/08/04
Loc: Topeka
Quote:

"And the award for Mr. stick up my butt so I will come in and take a joke post and try to turn it into some kind of political bullsh!t statement even though I'm obviously NOT in the politics board goes to... JAYHEEL!!!"




Congrats - here's your honorary bleeding heart badge of merit.


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#511275 - 06/17/08 09:54 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: 13Hawk]
jayheel Offline
Under New Management

Registered: 12/29/06
Loc: Spencer Basement
I didn't say it wasn't funny...just unfounded.
Now if the jokes were about French hygiene, that'd be funny and true.
_________________________
It's shame because hating on the Jayhawks means you hate the United States of America.

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#511276 - 06/17/08 10:12 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: 13Hawk]
MICHHAWK Offline
Wilt Chamberlain

Registered: 08/29/02
Loc: Port Huron MI
All very funny, and all very true. You cannot have enough "frenchmen" jokes.

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#511277 - 06/17/08 10:13 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: MICHHAWK]
jayhawklaw Offline
Baby Jay

Registered: 02/02/08
Loc: Free State Lobby
Quote:

All very funny, and all very true. You cannot have enough "frenchmen" jokes.




Possibly true, but a lot of these are re-constituted Polish jokes. Somehow, they are more P.C. this way.
_________________________
Am I not turtley enough for the turtle club?

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#511278 - 06/17/08 10:19 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: jayheel]
stevemize Offline
Junior Jayhawk

Registered: 08/17/05
Loc: World Golf Village, FL
French army rifles for sale...Never fired, only dropped once.

Frence Army Knife...

ivman.com/fp-frknife.html
_________________________
If my aunt had nuts, she'd be my uncle.

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#511279 - 06/17/08 10:19 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: jayhwk01]
seanr9ne Offline
Pure Jayhawk

Registered: 10/16/07
Loc: KC
Quote:

Quote:

The French lost 1,300,000 in WWI...4,000,000 wounded. 3 out of 5 males 18-35 were either killed or permanently wounded. I wonder why they didn't feel like fighting 20 years later after seeing the Nazis wipe Poland's ass.




Yes far better to roll over and be slaves or worse than to fight. I think the Brits and and a couple of other European nations lost a few people in the Great War but they somehow mustered up the courage to defend themselves against Hitler's Nazi's.





Hail King Leonidas!

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#511280 - 06/17/08 11:14 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: jayheel]
13Hawk Offline
Baby Jay

Registered: 07/08/04
Loc: Topeka
OH.


Carry on then

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#511281 - 06/17/08 11:14 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: seanr9ne]
jayhawker010 Offline
Junior Jayhawk

Registered: 03/10/08
Loc: WtW
Haoo! Haoo! Haoo!
_________________________
Victoria Concordia Crescit

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#511282 - 06/17/08 07:22 PM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: jayhawker010]
Morgansraider Offline
Why...So...Serious????

Registered: 02/24/05
Shut up, Jayheel. Stop being intelligent.

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#511283 - 06/17/08 09:25 PM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: Morgansraider]
jayheel Offline
Under New Management

Registered: 12/29/06
Loc: Spencer Basement
Hahahaha. Oh you.

For the record, I hate French people.
I do, however, love french toast.
_________________________
It's shame because hating on the Jayhawks means you hate the United States of America.

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#511284 - 06/18/08 06:45 AM Re: How many gears does a french tank have? [Re: jayheel]
13Hawk Offline
Baby Jay

Registered: 07/08/04
Loc: Topeka
SSSUUURRREEE... but do you like pie?

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